I know, it's been a while since I updated. Too long, but in my defense, I don't owe you a defense. On November 5th, a funny thing happens in the little town of Lewes. Lewes used to be the capital of Sussex, and therefore has a castle. But as the days pass we little men move on, and so has happened to Lewes, now only a town of about 10,000. One thing remains, however, they remember to burn things.
On November 5th, 1605 a plot to blow up Parliament was foiled. Surrounded by 26 of his favorite barrels of gunpowder Guy Fawkes was arrested. He was tortured and then executed. To celebrate, bonfires were lit across the country. Lewes, still remembers.
It also remembers to dress up eight year olds as pirates and get them to run around with torches. Frankly, I'm not sure how the costumes are involved, but it was magnificent. "Poppers", which amount to cherry bombs were tossed about as if sprinkling a cake. Bonfires 3 or 4 stories high were lit aflame because it's a fucking blast...err...I mean the king...safety. 
All I know, is that if I ever have a boy, when he turns eight, I'm bringing him to Lewes, dressing him up like a pirate, handing him fire on a stick, and letting him run off to do what men must do.
Again, I apologize for the latency in this post, it took me a while to figure out how to type with my new finger boards.
Did you know that gasoline increases the thermal efficiency of fire? It's true! It's the fun NATURAL way to improve your bonfires by up to 80" and make them last twice as long! Hard to believe? Well if gasoline didn't make fires bigger, hotter, and longer lasting could we afford to sell it?
ReplyDeleteBut please to remember the 5th of November, and to top up your fuel barrels.
Don't be like Poorly Petey Pyro, he ran out of gasoline and when all the girls saw the boys, he was the only one whose burning effigy was just a smolderin'.
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